parents

Leave, Unite and Become one

Geneis 2:24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.

Marriage needs to achieve these three objectives:

  1. Leaving parents
  2. Uniting with a wfie
  3. Becoming one flesh

Many marriages fail to clear the first hurdle. Some couples never quite leave their parents. Here are some manifestations of marriages being negatively impacted by excessive involvement of parents in marriages:

  • Demanding that the marital home be run exactly as Mom ran hers.
  • Constantly comparing whatever your partner does with your family experience.
  • Spending more time with your parents than with your spouse.
  • Seeking refuge in the family home when conflicts arise.
  • Calling on your parents to intervene and resolve disputes.
Parents need to learn to let go and allow their children to fashion a marriage that works for them. Their model is not necessarily the best one and it might not be suitable for the children. Their misguided concern about their children’s happiness might actually be achieving the very opposite.
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Can How To Raise Children Affect Your Marriage?

The techniques that are used to raise children are often handed down through generations without much modification. The principles laid down by great grandparents and their attitude to discipline tend to be evident in the child rearing practices of the present generation.

This is compounded by the fact that two separate family trees have contended on a daily basis through these generations about the principles and techniques to be used. Even minor differences in approach might produce conflict because parents are passionate about what is best for their children.

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